With seven-week-old Howie peacefully sleeping in her arms, it's hard to fathom the emotional strain Amelia Crispin and her partner Ben went through to have a baby.
"When I found out I couldn't carry a child on my own the longing became stronger," Ms Crispin said.
"When you can't have something, then you just want it more."
Baby Howie is one of the few children born via altruistic surrogacy in New South Wales.
The story of his conception is a lengthy medical, legal and financial process that the Crispin family from Newcastle believes deserves more attention.
Loading...What is altruistic surrogacy?
Starting a family via surrogacy can involve risk for everyone involved.
Altruistic surrogacy is where the surrogate receives no financial reward for carrying the baby, unlike commercial surrogacy, which is prohibited in Australia.
According to surrogacy lawyer Sarah Jefford, there are only about 115 surrogacy births in Australia annually.
"That is more than double what it was only a few years ago," she said.
"It's becoming more popular as more people find out about it."
Altruistic surrogacy is legal in every Australian jurisdiction but laws differ between states.
Under the Surrogacy Act 2010 in NSW, potential altruistic surrogates must be at least 18 years old, residents of NSW and be able to fully consent to the process.
According to Newcastle-based fertility specialist Myvanwy McIlveen the intended parents must also demonstrate a "medical or social need".
"The two most common reasons for surrogacy would be same-sex male couples who want to start a family and women who have medical conditions who have been advised against pregnancy by their treating specialist," Dr McIlveen said.
Journey to find a surrogate
Ms Crispin was 17 when she was diagnosed with MRKH syndrome, or Müllerian Agenesis, a genetic disorder that causes an underdeveloped or absent uterus or vagina.
It was discovered she had been born without a uterus.
After considering a uterine transplant, the couple began looking for a surrogate.
Legally, there are restrictions around advertising for a surrogate in NSW both as an intended parent and as someone willing to carry a child.
Initially, they joined a Facebook group to try and find their "team" – the term used for surrogates and prospective parents working together.
"They call it dating. They say you should date each other for 12 months," Ms Crispin said.
"We were like this is actually the weirdest thing we've done."
After a few failed "dates", Ms Crispin found her surrogate in an unlikely place.
"We'd stopped looking and then my friend Gemma [Cosgrove] just offered one day in the backroom at work," Ms Crispin said.
"I think I cried every day for two weeks straight after she offered."
Long and complex process
Even though they had found their surrogate, there were still many barriers for this "team" to overcome.
Altruistic surrogacy requires an obstetric report for the surrogate and both the surrogate and the recipient parents go through an independent psychological assessment.
It's also a financially onerous process. Intending parents have to reimburse their surrogate for "reasonable surrogacy costs" which can include medical costs, IVF rounds and counselling.
"We did stop counting, but we would say [the total cost was] probably $70,000," Ms Crispin said.
According to Ms Jefford, that cost is normal for couples in Australia.
"My estimates could be anywhere from $15,000 to $80,000."
The high cost, potential risks and bureaucratic navigation involved can make altruistic surrogacy unappealing except to those who have limited other options.
Dr McIlveen believes that while awareness of surrogacy is slowly growing, these barriers are not making it accessible for potential parents.
"I don't think surrogacy is increasing in demand because it's complex and expensive," Dr McIlveen said.
"It has to be a couple who are fairly committed to the whole process."
'It's so worth it'
Even now with Howie born happy and healthy, there are still more requirements for his "team".
"We all have to do more counselling to then get a report to then get a parentage order from the court which will put mine and Ben's name on [Howie's] birth certificate," Ms Crispin said.
"It's really, really hard. But it's so worth it."
According to Ms Crispin her strong connection with Ms Cosgrove has made the journey easier.
"It's more than just the baby. It's about your relationship with your team. It's something really unique that we cherish," Ms Crispin said.
"They're more than friends and they're kind of more than your family."